自閉妹溝仔警世文

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之前寫過篇文關於自閉症嘅愛情,今次我受到刺激,我決定要寫篇警世文俾所有光譜障礙女患者同而家被光譜障礙患者倒追嘅男人(我講唔到男人個part,歡迎討論)。以下落嚟我會用我最真實嘅語言去話你知呢個世界對光譜障礙女患者嚟講係笑話,成篇文會粗口橫飛,但我唔撚講出嚟只會有更多受害者!

我好撚唔妥個啲乜撚濕鳩愛情語錄,講埋啲:「如果女人失去貓性,就是她離開你的時候。」我屌你啦,將成個世界啲女人都比喻為貓,我唔撚係貓嚟架!我係呢個世上唯一一隻最靚嘅人馬!啲女人成日都將自己包裝到成隻貓咁,係呀,啲男人好撚受架,當自己耐唔耐做attention seeker,嗲下個男人,然後個個男人都變貓奴。講到呢度,我擺撚到明就係酸,我妒忌正常女人嘅嬌嗲功力使撚擇日?因為我唔夠佢哋叻吖嘛!我最勁嘅一樣嘢就係有alter ego,一飲醉就火力全開,變成love and hug giver。

我飲醉簡直就係一部超高速運作嘅情感處理器。呢樣嘢,對我嚟講簡直係又愛又恨!屌你老味,我開咗turbo居然將我對他人嘅好感放撚大到一萬鳩倍,然後個腦又運作得比平時快,搞撚到我好似癲鳩咗咁,係咁散播「愛意」,係咁製造根本無撚存在過嘅情感數據。搞撚到自己成鳩日表撚柒錯情,喪收好人卡,柒到無朋友。然後就莫名受傷鳥。

如果你想變到好似正常人被動式主動咁溝仔,我勸你算撚數,因為係無可能!你個大腦一出世就唔撚係正常女人個腦呀,係接近男人個腦呀!一係食藥,一係食大麻(當你喺美國、加拿大、荷蘭先好做),一係飲酒,呢三樣嘢係可以幫到你無咁男人,但你睇到我上一段寫嘅副作用,咁你自己衡量啦!

不過就算乜撚都唔做,我哋呢啲自閉簡直係溝仔界嘅冷面笑匠,妄想症患者,屌你!我想架?日撚日日要喺個腦入面攞本<人類情緒語言分析10000001>香港版、歐美版、法國版、中東版.....出嚟,係呀,法國本身我都開咗本呀!鬼叫法國人咁撚難理解咩?見到啲從未見過或者唔肯定嘅身體語言訊息就跟住本<人類情緒語言分析10000001>亂鳩咁嚟解讀!成日都尷尬癌發作,搞出各種笑話。我哋唔撚識睇眉頭眼額,啲人大到咁上下就以為你社交技巧乜柒都有番咁上下去接收資訊同表達自己。但sor9ly,我哋淨係可以正常表達自己已經係俾多咗你。唔好對我哋咁Mean好唔好?

我哋都唔想搞大件事,但好多時,當我哋知道自己柒撚咗嘅時候,我哋就變到好焦慮,好撚驚自己為左打圓場而令到件事變到更柒,甚至失去一段友情。然後就會過度分析成件事,整埋啲濕鳩結論,令自我感覺良好,跟住繼續柒落去。其實我哋根本唔需要去諗柒唔柒或者點兜,反正都柒咗,咁條友去到最後都係覺得你最啱佢就會搵方法接近你架啦,無期望就無失望。

我呢種失敗次數多撚到數唔晒嘅女人,根本都仲未撚放棄過要靠自己嘅奇撚怪魅力去吸引男人。個心充滿著莫需有嘅疤痕,好撚痛,但呢啲係血的教訓。咁咪話俾自己聽,下一段嘅感情可以控制同處理得再好啲。有時諗返起唔開心,咪大聲喊到人哋以為你屋企死咗人,然後振作再出發囉。

呢個世界需要更多自閉光譜女性,仲要好似我呢啲!點解?我嘅出現根本就係拯救緊男性嘅自信,女性嘅自主!柒咗唔緊要,呢個世界總有人唔鍾意貓,而鍾意我呢啲咁稀有又可愛嘅生物。

Now I recap in English:
To all the boys that I ‘liked’ before, I just wanted you to know that, you can’t find another lady like me on this earth, I am here to boost your confidence and telling all the ladies that they can make a move without being ashamed!

As a person on the spectrum, we often jealous of those ‘normal’ ladies that they can behave in a way that most men like. We are often struggling to express ourselves and to receive certain emotional information. The more that we tried to ‘intoxicate’ ourselves by alcohol, weed (applicable only in USA, Canada or Netherlands) or prescribed medicine, to match the image of a ‘woman’ generally accepted in the society, the more we failed, and we failed hard, we ended up creating silly moments, social anxiety, and over analyzation. Sometimes, we made a confession, but that was caused by a misunderstanding or an impulse in our brain, and we realized that it was unnecessary. That was because, under certain circumstances, we tend to magnify our emotion and passion like nuts, which we didn’t mean to.

Anyway, if you have read this, I just wanted to say: “I am appreciated for having me in your life for a short time, I hope we can still be friends, after all these crazy shits that I have just created.”

 

作者:SAZI

沙一粒。重要咩?

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ID: 205896
Date: 2020-04-26 06:46:28
Generated at: 2021-06-16 14:43:45
Permalink: https://www.vjmedia.com.hk/articles/2020/04/26/205896/自閉妹溝仔警世文